My name is ZZ Myers, but I’ve never been able to grow a beard as long as my heroes. I live in Minnesota, even though I love octopi. No, I mean I REALLY love octopi. My wife is a marvelous Grimpoteuthis discoveryi of enormous size. Let me tell you, fellas, you’ve never felt anything until you’ve felt beak. My children are half-breeds I keep in the basement. Nothing like our family gatherings. I’ve lost several toes to the little nippers, but I figure it’s all part of playing daddy to the new master race.
If you’ve seen me with my rent-a-family, don’t be fooled. I have no love for other humans. Most of my blog posters are various invertebrates, including turd of red head and Josh I-love-men-please-find-me-offensive. If it seems like we don’t like anyone, we don’t. We’re just waiting for our time.